Dear Mother and Father,
I've finally cleaned out the hobbithole and everything is spic and span again, though I know that won't last long thanks to that Jardic fellow. He leaves his dishes out after emptying the pantry and the other day he stole a whole batch of fresh-baked biscuits from the windowsill, leaving crumbs trailing through the house. When I followed the trail with the broom, sweeping up the crumbs, I found him sitting in his bed and munching away on the biscuits. He didn't even try to hide that he'd stolen them, he just said that him eating all of them was a compliment to my cooking and that cooking like that needed to be appreciated properly! I was so mad I wanted to hit him with the broom. But I didn't, I walked away, only to find the ham half-sticking out of a cupboard. When I asked, he told me it was for a midnight snack! To make things worse, he's somehow gotten into Rua's good books. They drink ale together and smoke pipes and Rua tells him stories of the dwarfs and embarrassing tales of when I was small and they get along like a house on fire. Rua even made him a proper bed, bigger and softer than mine! It's most upsetting. Oh I suppose Jardic is a nice enough fellow, if you don't have to clean up after him and get your cooking stolen by him!
As if staying at my place isn't enough, I'm sure he followed me to the GDF. I was looking forward to a lovely night of dancing and music and enjoying the company of my fellow hobbits. I got there early and practiced my harp a bit. I'm so rusty! Then miss Amorey and her brother, master Tahitoa arrived, but I was so shy, even though miss Amorey asked me to carry on, I didn't dare to. So they played some lovely melodies before they left to do something, saying they'd be back later. I played a bit more and was so caught up in the music I didn't notice a new fellow had arrived. He introduced himself as Shirriff Mellam and a very nice fellow he seems to be. He played a merry tune or two and then before I knew it we were surrounded by hobbits and the evening had begun!
To my delight, miss Bootsy came and played a few songs. She's as talented as ever and I danced so much, there must be a new threadbare patch on the rug. And when the Brandy Badgers played, master Simbo sang a song. He smiled at me before singing, so I thought maybe he was singing it to me! It was a lovely song and during the evening he danced with me several times, making me feel so special that I barely cared that Jardic was there, though I did notice he was getting along very well with miss Acorne and danced with her a few times. Later he told me she'd even asked him to save her a dance at the next GDF.
It seems miss Akelay and master Adrean have had a baby! A little son, named Lyshko and everyone is invited to the baby warming party on sunday. Maybe she should be called missus Akelay now? I shall have to ask around discreetly. Also, I still haven't thought of a good present, though Jardic has. I will have to think of something better than his, but it's very hard.
Oh and the Summer Picnic is due soon! I am so looking forward to that. There will be a poetry competition and I am thinking of signing up for it, even if it has been a while since I wrote a poem last. Though I must say Jardic gives me inspiration, but not of the good kind, though the practice will do me good.
The Nuisance Hobbit
There is a hobbit that I know
I'll name no names nor ever show
that he annoys me quite a lot
Since Rua too has a soft spot
For this provoking hobbit lad
(Though no one else thinks he is bad).
The pantry's bare of things to eat
while crumbs cover his clean bedsheet.
He's tracked the butter through the hall
and sticky prints cover the wall!
(I don't know where he found the jam,
or why he had to hide the ham).
He steals my biscuits when I bake
and rattles the dishes 'til they break,
And Rua thinks that I'm the one
who ate his morning coffee bun!
(It's just not fair and most untrue
For all those things, I'd never do!)
He's even tried to pull up weeds
And thrown away my flower seeds
that I was saving for the garden.
He barely says I beg your pardon
after he burps while drinking ales,
impressing Rua with his tales
Of fighting imaginary beasts
then celebrating with mighty feasts!
My favourite rug is rags and ruin
after he claimed it was a bruin
and pounced upon the innocent rug
spilling the contents of his mug.
It's good he knows not of my journal
Oh, why must such a lad infernal
be such a nuisance in my hole
When every other hobbit soul
A gentlehobbit thinks he be
and asks him to their hole for tea!
Your loving Zara
