I think that, by now, everyone in our House had heard the news of lord Anglachelm disappearance, and so it was with an heavy heart that I, Failindo, joined the house of the Harp for an evening of remembrance, as lady Mistë suggested.
I was first by the pool just outside the Last Homely House, though I didn't have long to wait before lady Mistë arrived as well. We exchanged greetings, and I sat down in silence, sorry to leave the talking to her, but not knowing what to say...
"Let us await others to come" she said, "though in these sorrowful days, I believe only a few will."
A short moment of silence fell between us, during which I was trying to find something to say to her:
"How are you feeling, after what happened in the south ?" Asked lady Mistë.
Surprise made me look at her, after all, I was so rarely sociable even within our House, that it was nothing short of a miracle that I heard the last news, between my very busy days in the forge and my appreciation for solitude. In these conditions, it seemed so unlikely that someone would be worried about my feelings on this situation...
"Should I not be the one asking you that question, my lady ? I answered finally.
-Maybe... But I have known hardships and sorrow in the past, and it is the duty of the Harp to settle the ground when the House trembles."
I couldn't help but think that if that was the case, we had more in common than I thought, and I said that out loud, though, some would wonder if it was wise to say so, considering that I was first and foremost a Feanorian.
"There will be those who will seek revenge, those who will seek glory, and those who will drown in sorrow."
Hearing these words, I winced. Yes, people in our House were all likely to go for one or the other of these three behaviors, and as I recall, none of them did any good for our race in the past :
"If I can help with anything, I will. I know all too well the damage such an even can create." And I was really not in a hurry to live that again in the present times.
"That is why we are gathered today. To remember a time when our people went through a similar fate."
Elloen then arrived, and sat with us :
"Welcome Elloen. Let's wait a little longer. And how are you ? After what happened in the south, I am worried about everyone in our House.
-I am fine. What happened in the south ?"
A smiling elleth approached quietly while we talked.
"Didn't you hear ?" Asked Mistë with a sceptical voice "Our lord Anglachelm has disappeared."
Shock was written on Elloen's face at the news :
"I only just arrived back in the Valley... The last news I heard was that Tindir took over the Hammer.
-Then I am afraid I am the harbinger of bad news."
We were all listening as Mistë summed up for him what happened in Eregion, and what everyone in the House knew already, that nothing more could be done at that time.
"Tonight, though, I would like us to remember a time when something like this happened to the Noldor. Some of you may remember that time, for it was during the fall of Eregion, during the war between the Enemy and us." Said Mistë.
Elloen nodded and looked down at the ground, while I was already miles and years away in my mind.
"At that time, the lord of Eregion was Celebrimbor, the elf-smith, of the house of Fëanor. He, who like our lord Anglachelm, had lived in Gondolin, where he learned from its greatest craftsman. It was a time when Eriador was covered with deep forests and not only the small clusters that remain nowadays. Enedwaith was a forest as thick as Fangorn. But the Enemy revealed himself, and for a century menaced Eregion with the power of his One Ring. Finally, war was everywhere, and the orcs burned down the forests as they advanced. Black clouds arose on the horison as the flames engulfed the lands. Endless hordes of orcs ravaged the lands, and the Eldar of Eregion saw their doom coming. It was at that time, when they asked their liege, Gil-Galad, for assistance and he sent Elrond as his bannerman. The half-elf whose blood came from all the great lineages of the First Age. And so Elrond headed the evacuation of the last fortress of the Eldar, Ost-in-Edhil. There would Celebrimbor fight Sauron, for he knew he craved the elf-forged where the rings of power had been forged. And while Celebrimbor prepared for a last stand, Elrond led the Noldor and the Sindar out to the north and the east, in the hopes to lead them to the safety of the kingdom of Galadriel, Lorien. They sought passage through their friend's kingdom, Khazad-dum..."
As the lady was talking, image of the past seemed to come to life in my mind and before my eyes.
~Year 1700, Second Age. A ruined outpost near Ost-in-Edhil. Smoke in the sky to the west.
That day in my memory is clear as crystal. I was standing at the edge of some new ruins, a child and an elleth no far from my side, though I knew neither of them. Well, I did remember seeing the child sometimes, in the street of the city, but... We were all wearing blood and smoke stained clothing. Maybe I was applying to them what I knew of me, but to my eyes, our tiredness was like a bright red beacon in our face, and our posture.
It was then that I saw an elf running toward us. An elf I knew. He was name Feahelka and was a Feanorian, like me.
"At last, friendly faces. Aiya, Failindo..."
I couldn't help but notice that he was wearing the emblems of the house of Fëanor on his armor, as his eyes were straying on every one of us :
"Feahelka, what news ?"
I really didn't want to ask, but I needed to know.
"The worst, I'm afraid. The fortress has fallen, Ost-in-Edhil is no more and..."
I saw his eyes fall on the younger elf (barely more than a child) who was listening to his words, still trying to cover the blood on his clothing, his eyes full of the horror he had just lived.
Feahelka's voice drop to a whisper for my ears only, from one Fëanorian to another. Did that mean that I wanted to know what he wanted to say ? Absolutely not. Long gone were the days when I could take any and every news with courage and hope for the future. Though, I did not stop him I did need to know what he knew.
"And some have seen celebrimbor being captured alive by the enemy."
I felt myself beginning to shake, as rage was taking its hold on me, even as I did my best to stay silent and think rationally...
"I want to gather a force to free him but I need to get to Elrond first, only he has some strength left in these lands."
And this was the reason why I needed to think. This idea was appealing, Oh, how I longed to just follow him and go after Celebrimbor. But we needed more than two elves, one well prepared, and one even in need of a proper armor.
From the corner of my eyes, I saw the elleth turn to see the elf child and try to smile to him, but she seemed deeply weary as she saluted him. She seemed about to talk again, but got a glance at the blood :
"Are you hurt ?" She asks, concerned.
I ignored them for a moment, the matter at hand slightly more demanding of my attention. I shook my head at Feahelka. How could he even hope to free Celebrimbor from the army of Sauron when we were reduced to flee and hide from his army, the both of us, with a child and an elleth ?!
"Lord Elrond's strength will not help us, Feahelka, but I agree, we need to find Elrond and all the elves who could flee from the destruction."
I watched as Feahelka moved to the nearest wall, to recover his breath, and saw our young companion, noticing for the first time how he was covered in blood too :
"Young one, let me see your wounds.
-There is none.
-Perhaps you should sit and rest awhile ?" Proposed the elleth.
The younger elf moved his hands, showing that the clothes were not damaged, apart from the blood.
"Whose is that blood ? Someone you cared for ? It's red."
-It's my mother's..."
Anger arose again in Feahelka's eyes, while I could not help but wince at that new information, as I put a hand on the elfling's shoulder :
"No words will do her justice, but still, I am sorry for your loss, young one.
-I swear ! This day, I swear they will pay !" Roared Feahelka.
I wondered a minute if we should be careful of the lady with us, as she seemed extremely worried about what we were saying to the child.
"On the ashes that rain over this land ! I swear !"
-What is your name, young one ? Asked the elleth seemingly eager to stop Feahelka talking more.
-I am Elloen.
-Come Elloen, we will go inside and I will make you some tea.
-Anyway, this is the first group of elves I have found. We have to move, before the orcs arrive here." Said Feahelka.
Eliriael nods to us, gathered as we were around a fire, and picked up a hot kettle, with a thick cloth.
I think I was standing the farthest away from that fire. I've just been witness of too many of them to not be wary and to be looking for comfort from it.
"Young one, come with me, I will make sure you reach safety... So you can get your revenge some day." Said Feahelka eating some food at the same time to recover some strength at least.
The elleth seemed to have honestly decided to care for the youngest of us, and poured some hot water into a cup with holly leaves.
"Feahelka, maybe it is not yet time to speak of revenge. We need to get out of here before all, and you know this as well as I do." I said, decided to not stay at that place too long.
However, Eliriael turned to Elloen and gave him the cup :
"Sit, Elloen and rest awhile before we have to move again. We may be on the way for long and you will need your strength.
-There is no time to rest !" Protested Feahelka. "If you lag behind, you are doomed. On your feet ! We have to march east."
The younger elf took a sip of the tea and seemed to feel a little better for it.
"Listen ! We have to meet Elrond near the Sirannon !" Shouted Feahelka.
The elleth nodded slightly, acknowledging the ellon : "Let him finish his tea, at least.
-Tea ? The Enemy will not care for tea !" Answered Feahelka angrily as Elloen put the cup aside, and I was agreeing with him on that if not on his plan to find Celebrimbor, though...
I groaned at Feahelka's lack of diplomacy "Lady, young one, we can not stay here, as much as I would like to take the time, time is what we lack.
-I'm ready. Said Elloen.
-Then let's move." Decided Feahelka.
The elleth seemed more worried about the adolescent than about our plans to leave the area. She sighed and looked at him as Feahelka left the ruins and peered into the distance :
"They are not far, in one or two hours, they will be here. The wargs scouts may be here earlier. He informed us.
-Then we should go, now.
-We need to avoid the paths. Come. Mount your horses."
Together, we rode from ruins to rock formation, to fallen trees to try and hid our presence. Until we crossed the path of some wargs, in the middle of a devastation that was a forest even a few days before.
"They burnt our land. The ash is still hot." Said Feahelka, kneeling in the dirt, before standing up again and he added : 'Come, the wargs will not harm us."
In a hurry, we left the scene, riding hard toward the river until we finally reached it :
"The Sirannon !" Exclaimed Feahelka. "There ! I see Elrond's batters ahead ! We did it !"
We joined the refugees already there :
"Rest a little, before we head into Khazad-dum, I need to speak to Elrond now. Go and let the horses eat. You can wash in the river." Feahelka informed us, before leaving us to speak with Elrond if he could find him.
While Elloen got closer to the river, I took a look around. The scene was so reminiscent of other times and other places I had seen... Desperation was written on most faces, elves here had lost their homes, some their families, friends... All were hoping to be able to enter the dwarves' kingdom to reach Lothlorien. Some clans were already formed in the camp. Noldor at one side, Sindar in the other, though feelings were too defeated for clashes to happen, even as words of Celebrimbor's capture was spreading like fire among them.
After a while, I finally noticed that Elloen was at the river, trying to wash the blood from himself... Unsuccessfully. Until he sat down close to the water :
"I do not even know what happened to my ada. Said the adolescent as I was approaching him.
-I am sorry, young one. I wish I could tell you that he is fine but... "
A short moment of silence fell between us, until I asked again :
"I am sorry if I hurt you by asking this question, but... Do you have anywhere safe to go ?"
Feahelka's arrival interrupted me as he came to sit with us, though, what I meant to ask was clear enough with that first question.
"Nay. I am feather in the wind now.
-We all are, I'm afraid. Said Feahelka.
-I have no home. Continued Elloen.
-When our people heard of the capture of our lord, some rallied to rescue him. Elrond has forbidden us to go." Began Feahelka, hitting the ground in a show of anger. "He says he needs us all to protect the refugees because... The dwarves are not opening their gates. Traitors ! Cowards !"
-I beg your pardon ?! They refuse... " I couldn't believe that, and I stood there, disbelieving, my eyes on my fellow.
-If they opened their gates, you could pass into Lothlorien, and we could storm Sauron's sense of victory to free Celebrimbor or die with him with honor !" Continued Feahelka, anger showing in every breath, every word, every movement. "Now we are trapped here.
-My uncle and aunt live in Lorien... But they can't help now."
Feahelka threw a big stone into the water :
"There is a world between us and them, and the host cannot go through Caradhras, the orcs would catch us in the way and slaughter us. We cannot go south, the land is full of fire and devastated lands. We cannot go west, where the Enemy is. Not East for the dwarves have forsaken us. Only north is left. Into the wild lands and the troll havens. But I swear, the day will arrive when I will have revenge on this shame ! Revenge on the Enemy ! Revenge on those thrice damned midgets ! Treacherous things ! Our friends ?! Hah ! Only while they could trade mithril with us ! Now they show their true faces, hidden beneath those beards !
-I am no soldier yet, like my father. If going north is what must be, then I'll follow. Said Elloen.
-Well said, boy. Live I say ! Live so we can fight another day. When we served the sons of Fëanor, we lived to fight another day, to keep the Oath. Live, I say, and remember. Always remember this shame, let it be your strength !
-If you mean live for revenge, I beg to disagree. This already happened once, and it drove our people almost to... I will live, yes, but I say not for revenge. Live to protect and honor the memory of the fallen." I interjected this time. Revenge never got us anywhere, and it killed most of our people in the past.
"Perhaps, but I need other reasons to live as well. Said Elloen with a blank look.
-And what about our lord, captured ? Do we leave him behind ? Asked Feahelka.
-Would you sacrifice the lives of the refugees ? The lives of children to, maybe, eventually save one ? I am loyal to him Feahelka, but even He would not ask us to make that choice. If, in the future, there is hope to rescue lord Celebrimbor, I will not let it pass, but as it is, all we would do, is destroy even the memory of our home by destroying what is left of our people.
-You did not understand, young one. I will not risk your lives, not when our lord risked many lives so you could flee. But I cannot forget, ever, that the dwarves of Moria closed their doors and denied us a release on our duty that would have allowed us to get a chance to save our lord or die with honor.
-None of us will forget, Feahelka, you can be assured of that." I answered.
~Present time, Imladris
"... And so was it. At that time, we faced the same choice as today. A lord of the noldor captured by the Enemy. Our kin eager to a suicide rescue.
-Few have ever succeeded. Commented Elloen.
-Celebrimbor died. Executed by Sauron, after he revealed him most of his secrets, like the location of the Nine. Some say, his weakness costs us the Ringwraiths. Yet, amid that dark day, hope emerged. This hope. The very place where we are now, for in the north, Elrond finally found a hidden place, a valley unknown to all. Imladris. And here, those refugees stood until help from Numenor arrived.
-Sauron had a personal grudge with Celebrimbor. Of Anglachelm I do not know. And I do not know either whether it is good for this situation or bad. Noted Elloen.
-And the war tide changed. Anglachelm is our lord and always will be. Both knew war and duty may lead to terrible fates. Yet us, the Eldar, the Noldor, in the end, succeeded. Not alone, but with our allies, and it is our duty, the duty of the Harp, to remember, to learn, for in these days when terror may come to our hearts, we have to be the watchers of resolve. Had those who fell into despair charged against Sauron, they would have accomplished nothing. They would have died, and so would have the refugees. Imladris would not exist then, yet they stood their fast, and lost their lord to win the war. Only Fate will say if our lord will come back to us or not. And our eyes and ears should be open to any such change.
-Of course they will be.
-But we cannot allow our brethren to fall into folly and doom themselves. And now we have to prepare for the arrival of our brothers and sisters. Be their strength, stand by them, and temper their rage, their shame, their fears. I count on you. Finished Mistë.
-As I said once already, if I can help, I will. I said with more assurance than I felt.
-When I look back at our own story, I understand what you say. I will help as well. Agreed Elloen.
-Thank you. From my deepest thoughts, thank you Failindo, and you as well, Elloen."
We went each of us on our own separate way then, and I went back home, for a short while at least.
