“I demand tat yer investigate who stole me pie!” Billy bellowed, obviously starving and who was rubbing his belly pleadingly.
The Bounder cries out, “I’m sorry, Billy but we bounders in Stock got to put all our attention to those evil big folk down south!”
Billy growls, “I’ll do it meself since yer bounders can’t do anyting right!” Then he stormed out of the Golden Perch Inn, not aware that all the other hobbits heard every word and that they were disgusted that a pie should go missing.
Billy sighed then muttered to himself, “Time ter find out who stole me pie…”
At exactly three hours ago, he himself had baked a wonderful mushroom pie (his best yet!) but when he turned his back for one moment he found it was missing with crumbs on the floor leading out of the inn but then the trail of crumbs stops and Billy was clueless of what to do next.
Then he suddenly overheard a hobbit lass chatting away to a hobbit lad, “Have yer seen the lass who was running away with tha’ pie? I reckon it’s that pie tha’ lad from Staddle that gotten stolen!”
Billy’s eyes widened then he walked over to the lass, “’Scuse me did yer see where tha’ lass went off with me pie?”
he lass was rather a rather chatty lass with blond hair and green eyes, she also had a rather heartening smile as those would call it. The lass blushed for a moment as she saw Billy then say, “He went towards the direction of Woodhall.”
“Thanks!” He mumbled then he dashed off too the stables. “Apples! Come ‘ere I need yer to take me ter Woodhall!” Apples, his pony was a lovely steed, it was reddish-brown with dark brown points.
Apples neighed happy to see Billy again then snorted as if he wants something, “Ok, Ok – have an apple!” Billy said. Apples ate the apple quickly then when Billy was mounted on he headed straight for Woodhall with great speed.
Apples was a small baby horse when Billy found him wandering in Chetwood years ago, he found the pony weak, hungry and abandoned and if it wasn’t for him, Apples would have died! Since then, Billy and his family took care of Apples and the loveable pony became Billy’s friend – sort of part of his family.
When he arrived in Woodhall, he thought that someone would know something of his missing pie. But as he asked around, no one knew a thing about missing pies and most of these hobbits grumbled about how hungry they were or how the post turned into a rubbish service or some other whatnot that Billy didn’t bother to pay attention to.
“A missing pie? That’s ridiculous! No decent hobbit would steal a pie!” A bounder laughed.
Billy yelled, “Well, maybe this hobbit who stole me pie aint decent!”
The bounder replied, “Maybe it wasn’t a hobbit who stole yer pie? Maybe it was an animal? Or even one of those big folks!”
Billy pondered on this then went off following the road up ahead of Woodhall on Apples. Then as he passed through a stone bridge he dismounted his pony then walked over to the farm nearby.
“Oi! What yer vermin doin’ ‘ere!” shouted out a big folk who was standing guard.
Billy bellowed back, furious, starving and tired, “I’ve come ter git me pie back an’ I aint goin’ nowhere till I git me pie!”
Then the big folk laughed, “The Chief will be enjoyin’ the pie indeed! But can’t say tha’ same fer yer!” Then the brigand took out his blade and aimed for Billy.
He ducked almost immediately then picked up a stone and threw it at him. “Arh!” The brigand yelled out in pain.
Billy quickly dashed through the gates of the farm and entered it. He then ducked behind a large rock when he saw the whole farm was full of brigands. Then he overheard a large, scruffy big folk grabbing a lass who was rather pretty with chestnut hair and bright blue eyes. But on his other hand was his pie… “Ah, thank’ee fer the pie yer small rat.”
The lass cried out, “B-bbbut I need tha’ pie! Me family can’t survive fer long with their farm bein’ ruined by tha’ animals an’…!”
The chief barked out, “I don’t give a damn. Tha’ most important ting is yer brought me dinner!”
Then a brigand who was close to him asked, “But boss wouldn’t yer share sum of it with us? I mean we’ve never even tasted pie before…”
The chief growled, “It’s mine! Be grateful I even gave yer food at all!” Then the chief took out his blade and was about to plunge the lass with it and that’s when I came in… “Stop!!!” I screamed at the top of my voice, all the brigands suddenly turned their heads towards Billy.
“Ah, another ‘un eh?” The Chief smiled.
I bellow at the top of my voice, “Firstly yer’ll do well ter let her go. An’ secondly tat’s me pie yer git there so I demand yer give it back otherwise there’ll be consequences!”
Both the lass and all the brigands looked surprise at the tone of Billy’s voice and how livid he was but then the Chief laughed, “Well, I wouldn’t expect less from a hobbit – after all they do love their food…”
Billy barked out, “Give me back my pie an free tha’ lass immediately!”
The Chief dropped the lass who then ran behind Billy while the Chief simply marched up to him with his pie, “Ha no chance!” Then the Chief seized Billy by his neck with one hand then he says, “Time fer yer idiot to die…” Before the Chief could plunge at him, Billy kicked at the Chief’s stomach who then howled with pain and dropped him immediately, clutching his belly while the other ruffians watched in horror of what happened to their leader. Billy quickly took away his pie and with the lass.
Billy snarls, “If yer trouble other hobbits or steal our pies, I’ll deal with yer personally…” He then walked away with a pie in his left hand and he clutched the lass’ hand with his right. When they were safely over the bridge and near a round lake, he stopped then looked up at the lass. “What’s yer name?”
The lass stammers, “Poppy Bolger.” Then Billy says with a smile, “If yer jest needed the pie yer should have jest asked.”
Poppy flushed red, “Sorry…”
Billy says without thinking, “Here yer should take this pie. Yer need it more than me.” Then he hands the pie, somewhat ignoring the fact that he hasn’t eaten for hours!
“Yer sure? I mean I saw how angry yer were back there…” Poppy says nervously.
“I’m sure.” And with that, Poppy beams at him then blushes, “Yer can have dinner with us – I mean it’s yer pie after’all.”
“Sure!” Billy grins, happy that he will eat after all! Then the pair and Apples walked to Budgeford which soon brought more trouble to Billy… But that’s another tale for another time! And thus, the Case of the Missing Pie is solved.
