The last few days, I've felt incredibly stressed. It seems that no matter which way I turn, there is something I find that demands my attention ... the dwarves in Khazad-dum do little to help, not even themselves. I find myself wondering how they survive at all, having to rely on others to do even the simplest tasks for them.
The smell of the flowers, as I tend them, is most relaxing. I had not realized how peaceful such a simple act could be. Or mayhap, it is simply the fact that I am so tired, and so frustrated, that makes the act of tilling soil seem so by comparison. I am not sure, but I am thankful nonetheless for this brief respite.
I've told no one about the nightmares I've had recently, nor the constant feeling of despair that seems to weigh upon me like an anvil. They should not need to see my worries, they have enough of their own. Though, at times like this, I wish I could crawl into ... I just wish I could be held and cry myself to sleep.
For now, tending these flowers will have to suffice.
