ill-favoured evening

I cannot settle. There is something this evening, something ... It began after noon, as I walked along the lake shore, between the waters and the hills to the east. The birds began to fall silent. The air both heavy, as if resisting movement, yet chill. A sense of waiting ... of watching almost. Yes.. of watching. Though all is quiet I feel eyes upon me. I cannot decide, to move on into the marsh, perhaps out of the sight of eyes? - or to rest here where I can at least see sun or stars. I am foolish, to have walked on so long without Araenion and Randir. To have left most of my belongings, and my horse, with them. What do I have ... this diary, my embroidery, Esteluinil ... I feel that I must write... that in writing I am not alone. But... I am alone... loneliness ... it presses in upon me. A dreadful loss ... I should move! Move into the marsh, get out of sight, move ... lose myself in that featureless waste.