Damn it. Damn it all. I tried to help her but I ended up pushing her away. She...was inflicted by something bad and I just lost it with her. I couldn't sleep that night despite of Agreis trying to comfort me.
The next day, I felt worn. Weary from not sleeping. I couldn't face Dem the way I was for I had thought that he would blame me for her death. After all, I was the one that had talked to her last. I distinctly remember telling her that I would not want to see her face ever again and to go home. I drank about...three mugs of red wines, trying to forget. But I couldn't. I went to go be at my "treasure". This one guy tried to help but he couldn't. I couldn't smile. It was then when I had thought more of her infliction. I saw Siofran and we had talked about it. Afterwards, we made a cairn for her. I finally felt at peace a bit and determined to make sure she would be avenged.
And then... There's today. I ran into her brother. I...didn't get a name. Let me explain why. I took him to her cairn and explained to him of the infliction. We went back to the Pony and waited because I thought Dem could help, too. But... Things got out of hand. Dem couldn't be too much of help because he had blaming himself as well, even had a bruised hand. Then that bastard Jaesper came in. He orders me around when I wasn't at the best of moods already. What had hurt the most...was Dem telling me that I was on my way of being a monster that he warned me not to be. I was so frustrated, so upset. Jaesper came back and we exchanged spiteful words, ending up in a bit of a fight. Siofran and the others tried to stop us but it took a slap to the face by Miss Arrygg to have me to stop. I couldn't face any of them anymore so I took off. I could've sworn Jaesper glared at me.
Just...damn it all.... I'll find that bastard that took Khadejah away from us and make them pay. As soon as that is done though.... I don't think I can face any of them or Bree for a long while.... I think I'll stay home and practice while waiting for Agreis to be at home. Khadejah... You'll be avenged. I promise.
