Thargelion, year 336 of the First Age of the Sun
Ilmariel took a deep breath.
There he was.
Tall, and haggard, with fragile hands, clad in a white raiment of linen.
His walk was solemn, but simple.
He stopped in front of the open door.
Eyes like stars hit her. Bright stars, yet cruel and false, giving hope and taking it in the same time, stars full of visions and dreams, and full of unspoken wonders and horrors.
She opened her mouth, but he lifted his hand.
„Please - do not speak my name.“
Ilmariel fell silent.
„I must go.“
She felt her heart beating faster.
„Where? Why?“
„I shall return to the Water of Awakening, before my labour begins.“
„You can serve Endor here as well! We need you!“
Something in her mind screamed: I need you! But she did not say it.
But he seemed to understand.
„What is the purpose of life, Ilmariel?“ he asked.
„To understand, and make“ she answered.
He smiled gently. His deep blue eyes were fixed on her.
„You are one of the Aulendur, Ilmariel. You will always be. Your teacher, Nerdanel, told me the same.“
„Tell me then, disciple of the Irmendur, about the purpose of your life.“
She smiled, her heart beating even faster.
He spoke, soft and slow, but his words were powerful and strange.
„I shall help in preparing for the Third Arda. I am not alone.
But my place is in the east… I have seen it, in the gardens of Irmo.
You remember it, don’t you. The Malinornë of Lórien.
There I have seen it, a glimpse of Endor unmarred. Things have been set in motion…
Things greater than you and me, even greater than those who let us leave Valinórë.
I do not understand yet. But I will do what is right by serving.“
She took a few steps towards him.
„Heldonya… do not leave me alone.“
He smiled, as his eyes noticed movement behind her.
„But you are not alone.“
She turned around, as the child embraced her leg, asking her:
„Who is this, Amya?“
She put her hand gently on his little shoulders.
„This is one of your mothers best friends, Ráolor.“
The child took a few steps forward, then sat down on the ground in front of the haggard elf, looking up at him, his mouth wide open.
„Elen síla lúmenn' omentielvo, pitya-Ráolor“ the tall elf spoke, and inclined his head.
„How old are you?“
„I am three years old. Almost four. And how old are you?“
The haggard elf knelt down. Deep blue eyes met steel grey mingled with gold.
„I am still young enough to remember how I first saw the stars of the Valacirca, far, far in the east.
And I have seen the Two Great Trees blooming, more than four thousand times, if you want to know a number.“
The child tilted the head.
„How much is four thousand?“
„In the past, some thought it was not enough. Nowadays, many think that it was a fairly big number.“
„How did the Great Trees look?“
The tall elf smiled slightly.
„They looked like the music of a thousand harps and trumpets…“
„I have seen it too! I know where the two Great Trees are. But now they are losing their leaves.“
Ráolor laughed, and ran through the door, into the garden.
Two Deren were standing there, strong and large, their highest branches swaying gently in the mild autumn wind of Thargelion.
The child threw itself into the many leaves on the ground, rolling around.
„He belongs to Endor, more than we ever will“ said the haggard elf thoughtfully, standing up slowly.
„I know his spirit would have refused to be incarnated in Valinórë. To be in Endor was his desire from the beginning. Only in Endor he would become who he is meant to be.“
Ilmariel did not reply. Both were watching the little elf having fun.
„I do not want to send him to Lothlann“ she said, after a while.
„But you must. He must learn from Macilwë, just as he needs to learn from you.“
She lowered her head. Her husband served in Macalaurë’s cavalry that formed the eastern part of the circumvallation in the north. The Siege of Angband had now granted Beleriand a long peace, but those upholding the siege lived a life of constant vigilance, patrolling Ard-Galen, building fortifications and scouting Dor Daedeloth.
Macilwë used to return once a year, staying for a few weeks in Thargelion.
But it was not the physical distance between them that grieved Ilmariel.
Her husband had only eyes for weaponry and warfare, for everything in his life served one single purpose: to crush the enemy in the north. Even in his spare time in Thargelion he brooded over maps, forged weapons and trained hard in the art of combat.
Over the years, he had become bitter and grim. She felt as if his heart had gone blind. Blind to his wife and their son.
While she was constantly researching, trying to better her sculpting, exchanging with fellow artists, keeping the knowledge and the spirit of the Aulendur alive, he would belittle her work with disparaging comments, speaking about Nerdanel and even the high spirit Aulë in an embittered manner.
She knew, she could not avoid it: slowly, they had become estranged from each other.
Now that she was standing here, watching her son play, sadness and joy mingled in her mind.
The haggard elf glanced at her.
He knew.
„Verunya will only teach him how to kill. How to forge instruments for killing. He will teach him how to love destruction, and war-mongering.“
„Do not be mislead by the sweet taste of peace, Ilmariel. I can still hear the bloody waves of Alqualondë, accusing the world, reddening its foundations.
I never was a friend of Macilwë. But this peace has been created by those who know how to wield a sword.
Who will defend Valariandë when Angamando rises again to take it?“
She lowered her head again. She knew he was speaking the truth.
„Indeed, prince Findecáno drove back the great worm with his mounted archers, but what if there is more of that horrible breed in the depths of the north? And we still do not know how to fight the Valaraukar. We all know they are there, waiting to execute his orders.“
He was silent for a while, and she felt fear creeping up her spine.
„Once he has come of age, send him to Macilwë. He needs to be ready in case our hopes fail.“
She looked up, gazing at him.
His deep blue eyes were calm like the stars over great Telperion that once grew.
„Namárië, Ilmariel.“
She tried to answer, but the words seemed to be locked into her throat.
„Do not speak my name. I am of no importance.
Do not tell anyone about where I am going. My labour shall be neither known nor renowned.
One day, we shall meet again…in Aman.“
He smiled.
„But your son, Ráolor… My heart tells me I shall meet him once more in Endor.
In an other age, I may need his help, and he may need my guidance.“
He inclined his head, turned around and left.
She stood there for a moment, then looked down at her hands.
They were strong and skilled, used to the many years of wielding hammer and chisel.
But now they were trembling, like a pair of lonely leaves in autumn, shaken by the wind.
She took a deep breath.
She could see him from afar, like a slender, white tree, slowly fading from her eyesight.
And she whispered his name. And the wind whispered his name, and the leaves awoke, rustling.
(Ingame screenshot)
[Translations and Notes:
Endor - Middle-Earth (Quenya)
Water of Awakening - referring to Cuiviénen, where the first elves awoke during the years of the trees. After the War of Wrath, this place probably ceased to exist
Aulendur - Servant of Aulë (Quenya). Applied to those among the Noldor who actually entered the Vala Aulë's service and received instruction from him. Most prominent of them all was Mahtan, the father of Fëanor's wife Nerdanel; he was considered a master in metal and stone work. His daughter Nerdanel was considered a masterful sculptor.
Irmendur - Servant of Irmo (Quenya). Although this word is invented, there might have been a group of elves in Valinor who (just like the Aulendur) served the Vala Irmo and received instructions from him.
Third Arda - referring to Arda Healed. The wise believed that one day, after the Dagor Dagorath the final battle, the world in its primeval form and perfection, untouched by Melkor, would be restored. Finrod Felagund speaks about this new world in "Athrabeth Finrod ah Andreth".
Malinornë - another name for Mallorn, kind of a large tree growing in Valinor, Númenór of old and Lórien mostly (Quenya)
Lórien - land of dreams (Quenya). Referring to the place in Valinor where the Vala Irmo dwells.
Heldonya - my friend (Quenya)
Verunya - my husband (Quenya)
Valinórë - land of the Valar (Quenya)
Amya - Mummy / mother (Quenya). An affectionate form used by a child to address his or her mother
Elen síla lúmenn' omentielvo - a star shines upon the hour of our meeting (Quenya)
Pitya - little (Quenya)
Valacirca - Sickle of the Valar (Quenya). A constellation of stars set in the heavens of Arda by Elbereth.
Two Great Trees - referring to Laurelin and Telperion, the Two Trees of Valinor that shone before the creation of sun and moon
Deren - oak trees (Noldorin)
Dor Daedeloth - land of shadow of horror (Sindarin). The land north of Beleriand that lay around Angband
Alqualondë - Swan haven (Quenya). The place in Valinor where the First Kinslaying took part
Valariandë - Beleriand (Quenya)
Angamando - Angband (Quenya). The vast fortress of Morgoth, destroyed at the end of the first age in the War of Wrath
Findecáno - Fingon, meaning "Hair Commander" (Quenya). Fingon was considered an elven folk hero during his lifetime in Beleriand. After the death of his father Fingolfin, he became high king of the Noldor in middle-earth. He was slain in the battle of Nirnaeth Arnoediad.
Valaraucar - the Balrogs. Meaning "demon of might" (Quenya). Referring to some of the Maiar that followed Melkor, corrupted by his promises
Namárië - Farewell (Quenya)
Aman - Valinor, the blessed realm (Quenya) ]
