Gwen composed this song for Welten, known as Ser Cabbage. She may be found singing it when she is in need of coin:
Oh, Brave Ser Cabbage was a man of Bree
A bold, strong knight arrayed in leafy green
He did battle te keep us glad and free
Why, the doughtiest ye ever have seen!
But in the darkest, gloomy days o’ old
A length’ning shadow fell upon Bree-town
To render all o’ life so dark and cold
‘Twas a giant from the hills come down.
He was taller than the hills he walked
Each fist o’ his was the size o’ a wain,
And with a booming, thund’rous voice he talked
To demand he’d eat the town’s livestock slain!
Out o’ their fear the townsfolk worked to serve
Arion the giant’s hunger so great,
But one man had the courage, had the nerve
To most courageously retaliate!
Aye! ‘Twas Ser Cabbage, and he drew his sword
Proclaiming that ‘twas time to see the need
To take a stand against the o’erlord!
No more should Breeish beasts a giant feed!
The townsfolk of Bree cheered the hero strong
But feared the knight would meet a grisly fate.
Tailing a shepherd’s fleecy, flocking throng
Ser Cabbage aimed for the giant’s lunch date!
But to hide from the giant’s perception,
Ser Cabbage knew he needed a disguise!
He slew a sheep and donned its wooly skin
So he evaded great Arion’s eyes!
Yet he did too well, for to giant tall
Ser Cabbage seemed an appetizing treat
And down Arion’s throat, sheepskin and all
The giant did our brave Ser Cabbage eat!
Down through tall Arion’s gullet he fell
And saw whole livestock, wagons bearing food
Within the giant’s gullet- but the smell!
‘Twas foul, and swift darkened the brave knight’s mood.
Yet soon Ser Cabbage knew he’d had enough!
And banished reeking airs with pipe-weed sweet,
As Ser Cabbage smoked, the giant did cough!
The knight had ensured the giant’s defeat!
For with his keenest mind unparalleled,
Ser Cabbage gathered up the ruined wood,
Of wagons in the giant’s stomach felled,
And started a great fire, as he could!
So Arion, to cool his stomach hot,
Raced to the river for some water cold,
Ser Cabbage saw a chance, and had a thought-
He glimpsed a beam of light, shining so bold!
Ser Cabbage followed it, and he emerged
Into the day, through giant’s navel great!
Onto the bank, where river-waters surged
He did not his sweet vengeance long await!
Arion was leaning o’er the river
As brave Ser Cabbage caught his draping vest!
He had not the time to quake or shiver,
When our knight leapt upon the giant’s chest!
And boldly brave Ser Cabbage did declare
That Arion would trouble Bree no more!
He slit the throat, much blood sprayed through the air!
Arion met his end amidst such gore!
So when the river’s tide ran bloody red
The townsfolk knew Ser Cabbage served them well,
And so they’re safe, now Arion is dead!
Such is the tale I’ve taken time to tell.
