Found:
It's getting worse. The headaches and memory loss. It's been happening for months now, since that missing chunk of time in the North Downs. I have ignored it and denied it; I'm just tired, I'm just getting older, it couldn't have been that important anyway. But it's not just missing details anymore. Helegrandir has new clothes. He told me that I put them out for him since his old ones were ruined but.... I don't remember doing that. There weren't any in the house, I've had no one over whose clothes might have been left behind. Did I buy them and bring them here? Did I have them delivered? And just when did I take his measurements? I have no idea...
Meanwhile, Loakee accuses me of being scared of his brother. Apparently, I'm stiff and awkward around the elder fool. This can't possibly be because I have other things on my mind, of course. Nor can it be that the comfort I used to find within the bakery has been recently lost to me. It must be all about the brothers, right?
It was quite entertaining watching them fish for information on Rahvic, though. For professional entertainers, they are both terrible liars. "Just looking out for the lovely bakers reputation," my arse! He was trying to figure out if he should be intimidated by the necklace or not, indulging in perceived inadequacies instead of seeing that which is before him. I tried to set his mind to rest. Not at first, I'll grant, because watching him squirm was fun. But later. I tried. I don't think I managed. I needed air. My head.... but best not think of that right now.
I've largely retreated to the Wolf now anyway. It is less cozy and the tea isn't as good, but at least I can speak freely there. I don't have to constantly second guess comments that come naturally to me through fear of offending the delicate sensibilities of the prudish, repressed and hypocritical old biddies of Bree-land. I know why Owena asked it of me, and I do understand; it is her business, after all, her livelihood. She has to pander to the wishes and whims of the whiners, those who seek offense in all that is said and done just so they too can feel a part of the proceedings. Alienating them poses a threat to her income.
I don't blame her for the request she made of me but I do find it horribly awkward. I've been trying to cut down on the amount of masks I wear, not add more to the pile. How many lies do I need to live in one day?
Haritha has asked something of me as well. She was... cagey about it, refusing to give detail. Without detail I can't say whether I can or even will do it. It's "time sensitive." apparently, so I suppose I'd best chase her up on the matter in the coming days. If nothing else, this secretive mission might get me away from Towerglan for a little while, but even with such a tantalising prospect before me, I yet refuse to agree to anything without knowing what I'm after, where and why. I'm not about to risk my life for a lost teddy bear eaten by a drake or what have you!
I'm sure there was something else. Something else I meant to write...
Ah, 'tis lost to me. It couldn't have been that important.
