((A few memes that were had yesterday in Bree. This is not IC! Mmmm, fountains))
Neremnes leapt up the steps two at a time, almost bumping into Sewyn, the scowling man
she'd seen not long ago.
"Oops, sorry!"
Sewyn skirted out of the way without a word, and returned to silently judging Taelondir's bio.
Neremnes decided not to go inside after all, since the Pony kinda sucks, and chose instead
to get into the fountain, planting a kiss on it and giving it a big hug. She flirted with if for a
while.
"Mmmmm, fountain."
Brynleigh glanced at her from afar and blushed.
"Excuse me, madame?"
Sewyn descended the stairs.
"Hello?" Said Neremnes.
Sewyn quirked a brow, assessing her...unusual behavior. "What are you doing?" asked he
at last.
"It's a very good fountain."
"Aye, it is a good fountain...but not a bathhouse."
Neremnes kicked the water around a bit. "I beg to differ."
"Well, I'm afraid that according to the Bree-Land Revised Code, Article III, Section 14, in the
Fountain Clause, it it explicitly forbidden to wade, bathe or otherwise use the fountain in an
inappropriate manner, as defined by the discretion of the Bree Town Watch. No one wants
another Fountain Incident..."
"The fountain clause?? Are you fuckin' with me?"
Neremnes touched the fountain sensually and Brynleigh gasped in horror from her rock.
Sewyn wished he were, but the grim look on his face ought to have been evidence to the
contrary. "I lost friends that day, madame," said he. "Family."
Neremnes pressed her lips together. "To... to a fountain?"
"Just..." Sewyn looked down, trying to conceal a tear as it rolled down his cheek. "Just...
please step away from the fountain. For God's sake..."
"Who's God?" Neremnes stepped out of the fountain.
"It's but an expression, madame. We use it in Archet."
"That's nice."
"Thank you, madame. Please, have a pleasant evening. And please...be careful with
fountains."
"I'm sorry to hear about your friends. Fountains are typically on the move. Very dangerous."
Neremnes got back in the fountain.
Sewyn looked shaken to his fucking core as he passed Taelondir, his face grim with solemn
resignation.
"I need a drink."
Neremnes stepped behind the fountain and put her arms out like the arms of a monster.
"Wooooo, 'tis me, the fountain! I'm coming for your family! And your cookies!"
Sewyn returned soon after, ale in hand. Neremnes quickly got out of the fountain. At that
moment, Taelondir exiteds the pony to see Nem getting in the fountain. He raised a brow as
he came down the stairs.
Brynleigh was astounded at the mind-blowing quality of roleplay in Bree that evening.
Neremnes didn't hear any sarcasm in that. Sewyn expected that she had read it, actually.
"I wonder if there are more fountains in Bree," said Neremnes, spotting a mailbox. "That's
not a fountain. But good try, Nemmy."
Brynleigh hugged herself and seemed happier. Sewyn sipped his ale. His officer presence
was...powerful. Brynleigh felt the power and shivered. Neremnes tried to look natural, like
she hadn't just been in a fountain. Sewyn glared across the square at Neremnes. How cool
would it be if he had Oakley's right now? It'd be hella cool. You know it. I know it. We all
know it. Imagine him glaring at her through a phat pair o' Oakley's. Taelondir moved to the
bench closest to Nem and sat on it.
"You alright?" He said, trying not to laugh.
Neremnes glared back at Sewyn. "I'm perfectly all right, King Arnold the Terrible, Destroyer
of Worlds."
Sewyn tried to communicate through glaring that the Bree-Land Revised Code also prohibits
shenanigans, hooliganery, pre-meditated homicide, loitering and anything she might be
considering doing to that mailbox. And ESPECIALLY swimming in the fountain. Neremnes
looked Sewyn right in the windows of his soul... then got the fuck back into the fountain. She
loitered in the fountain. She committed shenanigans in the fountain. She thought about
homicide in the fountain. Sewyn opened Trooper With An Attitude by .38 Special on
YouTube in another tab. And while Neremnes thought about doing unmentionable things to
that mailbox, Sewyn 's eyes flashed red and blue as he went in for the protection and
service. Neremnes did some hooliganing. Seeing her from her rock, Brynleigh was tempted
to sin with Neremnes, and could not resist the corruption as Neremnes touched the fountain
sensually again. Sewyn was glad he wore the jackboots today.
"Join me, brothers and sisters! Let us commit all shenanigans!" Said Neremnes!!!
Sewyn disdained this...this degeneracy!
"Run with the potatoes, hand out the potatoes! Run with the potatoes, hand out the
potatoes!" Neremnes sung as she danced in the fountain with her hooligan brothers and
sisters.
Brynleigh whooped and hollered like a perfect heathen.
Sewyn begged them to please, please think of the CHILDREN! Taelondir facepalmed
laughing harder than he had in a long time. Neremnes thought of the children while she
danced in the fountain.
Sewyn barked loudly, "MADAME!"
Neremnes barked like a dog. She then barked like a tree.
Sewyn had seen enough. "Come peaceably, or I shall drag you away!"
Neremnes danced more vigorously. Sewyn developed a hopeless internet crush, and
Taelondir shook his head watching Nem.
"What have you been drinking?" He asked.
"The fountain!!" Neremnes hollered, still dancing.
Sewyn was sure to invigorate her. He surged forward, thrusting out a hand with which to
clasp the hem of her dress and pull her down from there! Had the any idea what she had
done?
Taelondir sighed. "Before the fountain, Nem."
Neremnes stumbled off the fountain. "Hello?" But she just kept dancing.
Sewyn glared into her eyes, the fires of Amon Amarth burning in his own. The Swedish
metal band, that is. Not the flames of the mountain.
"Have you been drinking this evening, madame?"
Neremnes increased the intensity of her dance.
"Madame, STOP!"
Neremnes danced ten times harder. Her shoes were going to explode.
Sewyn reached out for her head, his intent to grab her hair and to push her head down
toward the ground, that he might pin her. Fortunately, there was no controversy in Bree-Land
over Watch Brutality.
Neremnes fell to the ground, her shoes safe... for now.
"And the children. Thank God." Thought Sewyn.
Neremnes did a little groove on the ground with what movement she had available to her.
Sewyn crouched over her, his knee resting above her chest to keep her down (like the
Dunlendings under the oppressive boots of the Rohirrim). "You are under arrest, and you are
coming with me. Do you understand?" barked he.
"Sure thing, boss." Neremnes seemed tuckered out from all that dancing.
"What in the name of Eru did you do?!" Brynleigh cried, having just come back online.
"Now, when I stand you up again, you're going to stop dancing, and you're going to walk
calmly with me. Is that understood?"
"I think I can do that."
Brynleigh sat down and Taelondir shook his head in disappointment.
"If you fail to comply, I'm going to put you on the ground again. Is that understood?"
Sewyn 's accent had suddenly shifted from that of a Bree-Lander to that of a Sheriff Deputy
from rural Appalachia.
"Yeah, cool beans my guy."
"Now, I got all night. I am happy to keep putting you on the ground if you try me, and we can
spend the whole night like this. Do you want that?"
"Not for me. That sounds boring as beans.'
"Good. Now, up you go." Sewyn violently yanked her to her feet by her arms.
Neremnes was not dancing, but she was thinking about that fountain... mmmm... fountain...
Sewyn thought that all thoughts of the fountain ought to be considered Thoughtcrime. They
are a dangerous, evil necessity. Nothing more. She ought to be more careful, for the sake of
all that is good and just in our world.
Neremnes thought super hard about the fountain... and that mailbox. Oooooh...
Sewyn tangled his arm with hers in a way which was too convoluted for him to describe
through typing, but which would cause great pain should she try to resist his movement. He
"guided" her along to the jailhouse.
"Ow." Said Neremnes.
Sewyn escorted his detainee painfully and forcefully along.
Neremnes said "ow" again
Sewyn hoped she was learning her lesson. It could be guessed that she was in pain due to
her saying "ow". Sewyn also hoped she could fo'give him, but Neremnes was not the
forgiving sort.Sewyn threw her into the cell. "Dry off, criminal scum."
Neremnes touched the bars sensually. Sewyn slammed the door shut and sauntered
sensually off to register her with the Warden.
