Found:
These past two days have been... interesting. Is it two? I'm losing track.
Firstly, Atharann happened across my camp. I had been wanting to speak with him again, but tracking down Rangers is far beyond my abilities. It is far more simple to simply make myself available and wait; they'll find me sooner or later.
I had questions for him concerning his people, perceptions and likely outcomes. What he told me was.... comforting. Although I've little compuction when it comes to rushing headlong into danger for something that I want, still it eases my mind a lot to be informed that there is little of that to be had outside of the usual wildlife and nearby enemies. The Rangers themselves are unlikely to do more than watch my movements - which is hardly out of the ordinary - provided he can get word to them that I pose no threat to their sacred pond dweller. I'll give it some time before I depart, then, allow for the word to spread.
As Atharann left, a wild Gregwald appeared! The poor thing had become lost, it seemed, but was happy enough to have stumbled across me instead of anyone hostile. We spoke a while, as we do. He asked my opinion on a a couple of things, and tried his best to flirt. The boy has charm, though I suspect the girls he tends to associate with her far less experienced than I. It's adorable watching him though, and his blushes are quite delightful!
Rest has been... sporadic. There's been so much on my mind of late that it's difficult to be certain which part has effected me so. Does it really matter, though? It'll pass.
I was making a late breakfast when Ry happened upon me. He apologised for his prior reaction. Unexpected. I had thought the matter dealt with, but it seems to have been preying upon his mind. He'd not eaten and barely rested since last we spoke. Busy with other matters, perhaps, but when questioned he just said that he hadn't felt like doing so. It is possible that there's something more to it than that, but I cannot be certain.
I'm still not certain of him.
I trust him to a degree, hence my agreement when he expressed an interest in coming to Evendim with me. I don't believe he'd intentionally harm me one way or another, but still... He claims to want nothing. If this is true, then there is no clear motive for his actions or words, nothing to grasp, nothing to know or understand. If he truly wants nothing for himself - even if it's something as simple as wishing to live for another day - then he truly is the nothing he so often describes himself as.
I refuse to believe that.
Subsequently, I asked him to think on it. Not for my sake, but for his. He needn't tell me if he doesn't want to.
'Twas to my surprise then that, later, he admitted wanting something from me. As per usual, his words were winding, but as best I can decipher, he wishes a friend. Someone to talk to who won't turn away from him even if they are parted for a length of time. I can give him that much, at least. It is not too big an ask, though I wonder why he asks it of me. The others, I'm sure, would be only too happy to provide such a thing as well, and I know that he grows increasingly close to 'Dara. That he speaks of her almost every time we meet is telling.
He stayed with me for the night, for which I am grateful. The nightmares subside ever more quickly as he repeats his trick, allowing me much more restful nights. And, I must admit, I have become quite used to his presence at my side during sleep. His absence has certainly been felt these past few days, though I'd not admit that to him.
Seven more days, he says. Seven more applications and we shall see how well it has worked. I wonder if I will miss his company then. There's little point in dwelling on it. This was never meant to be a permanent arrangement and I cannot allow myself to wish that it were.
We are what we are, he and I.
Temporary.
