Her small hand tapped on the large door, "Mother? Mother, may I come in?" There were days when she hungered for a Mother's touch. This was such a day. The sound of rain lightly beating against the roof. "Mother I brought some tea." No answer. "Mother? Mama...?" Her voice cracked. Still no answer. "Please I just want to spend time with you. I finished all my lessons." Leohild did not speak to her children until she was good and ready. She thought that making her children wait, would teach them self-reliance. If they could just wait it out that they would be more formidable than ever. However, to Aellwenn it felt like a contest. Whoever could sit through indifference the longest, would be in favor of her Mother's attention. She put the kettle and tray in front of her Mother's room. Then she sat down in front of the door beside the kettle. "You won't forget me, Mama's aren't supposed to forget their children. I'll wait here until you call." Her voice was so small, so innocent then. A reminder that everyone is a child once.
The sound of a harp reverberated through the oak door. A testament to her Mother's presence. At the time her Mother was the ideal woman. The woman that she hoped to be one day. And so it didn't matter how many times Leohild made her wait, or how many times Aellwenn needed to beg. Any acknowledgment or recognition from her was like water to a parched tongue. As her back pressed against the door, the familiar sound of footsteps, came down the hallway. It was her sister, "Aellwenn, what are you doing awake? I got up for some water and you were gone. You know when Mother is playing the harp there is no talking to her."
At those words, tears flowed freely down her cheeks, "No! No, if I just wait a few moments longer. She will come out. She has to! I even made tea all by myself just for her." Aldway frowned at her little sister's pain and stubbornness. "It's too early to be out of bed. The sun has barely risen. Come away, we need to get back to bed before our goose is cooked by Nan."
Her little feet kick in the air as she is dragged away from her Mother's chambers, tears still flowing down her face. "No! No! I don't want to go back to bed." Five years old and making tea.. five years old and begging for her Mother's attention. It was hard to believe that Aldway was only eight at the time and already knew how to look after her. The tears continued and then...
Aellwenn woke up in a pool of her own sweat. "A dream.. only a dream.." It was early morning in Rivendell and the birds chirping outside of her window. This was the second time she woke up in her own pool of sweat. "I won't be like her... I refuse."
