This poem was first performed at Bullroarer Remembrance Day 2023
The Ballad of Bullroarer Took and the Battle of the Greenfield
‘Tis said a shooting star was seen,
The night that he was born,
As if foretelling what would come,
The deeds that he’d perform.
Full tall he grew, a healthy lad,
They called him Bandobras:
His strength and stature, all agreed,
No hobbit could surpass.
At Great Smials he spent his youth
Second son to the Thain
His brother would succeed in time,
He never would complain.
He loved to roam the Green Hills there,
Loved hunting with his club,
And fishing in the reedy stream
For dace and bream and chub.
‘Tis said that when he raised his voice,
The very trees did shake,
For such a mighty roar was heard
As if the earth would break.
At play among his fellow tweens
A giant of his kind,
Laughing, upon a horse he’d ride,
And leave the rest behind.
These halcyon days were soon to pass,
For winter gripped the lands,
And rumours from abroad were heard,
Of roaming goblin bands.
In Misty Mountains far away
Locked in civil war
In bloody conflict orcish hordes
Fought frenzied, tooth and claw.
Fierce and squat, their reddened eyes
Of cruel intent were full;
Yet there rose up above the rest
One they called Golfimbul.
This chieftain ruled with whip and lash
And tortures grim and dire;
Any who dared to challenge him
Were thrown into the fire.
As winter’s vice closed on Mount Gram
And dark clouds filled the sky,
Upon the peaceful hobbit folk
He turned his envious eye.
A mighty army raised he then,
Fierce orcs with hooks and spears
And marched them to the Greenfield’s edge,
With guttural cries and leers.
The scout who brought the dreadful news
Ran to Tuckborough all the way,
But the tale of that journey must
Be told another day.
Thain Isumbras, for it was he,
Summoned his second son;
“You must go north to lead our folk,
And do what must be done.”
Then messengers were sent abroad
To villages and farms:
A full-blown Muster of the Shire,
Hobbits called to arms!
With pitchforks, ploughshares, pots and pans
They came from far and wide,
And bravely marched toward the foe
And hid the fear inside.
Two armies faced off on that day
Across the hilly heath:
One with makeshift weapons equipped,
One armed to the teeth!
Snarling, spitting, growling,
The orcish horde advanced,
The hobbits shivered slightly,
As if they were entranced!
Then as they moved to meet the foe,
Mounted on a horse,
A lone figure did emerge –
‘Twas Bandobras, of course.
He rode straight up to the goblin crew,
And cried his challenge clear:
“If any dares among you,
Come forth and meet me here.”
Then Golfimbul with curling lip
Strode up and with a sneer,
Muttering in orcish tongue
Thrust forward with his spear.
The hobbit’s mount reared up in fear,
And nearly threw him down,
But Bandobras then reined him in
And wheeled away and round.
With fiendish glee the orc advanced
And moved in for the kill,
But he was stopped straight in his tracks,
And stunned he stood quite still,
For from the throat of Bandobras
Ensued a mighty roar –
“Begone, return now whence you came,
And trouble us no more!”
And then he swung his mighty club
The chieftain’s head was severed;
The orcs fell back in disarray,
Dismayed by such endeavours.
Now legend says a rabbit hole
Is where the orc’s skull landed,
But I, for one, will just say this,
O’er time tales get expanded!
But this I know, and so do you,
Bullroarer saved the Shire,
Long may his memory live on,
Long may this tale inspire!
