The longer I spend in Bree, the more I wish to leave. Days pass and I see my friends from time to time, but I find that I miss my home and the people within it. I miss the sense of belonging, the purpose with which all our actions are enacted, the feeling of being a part of something bigger than just myself.
I miss the hectic days, the bitter nights and even the howls of the wargs upon the wind. It is difficult to sleep now for, although such cries should probably be regarded with wariness or fear, I find them soothing. I miss having a purpose.
I drift through Bree, or so it seems, lost on an endless sea of emptiness. I have friends here, that much is true. They are what causes me to return each time, they are what bind me to this place. I come back for them, but I find myself alone more often than not and lonely in a way that I had never thought to feel again.
The world I grew up in has become alien to me. It is strange and distorted, or so it appears to my eyes now. Even some things that I had thought immutable have changed. Davick, it seems, seeks the head of Marinette and she, in turn, has sought my aid in this matter. I know not quite what to do about this.
Neither of us can be certain that he wishes her dead by his hand. It could simply be that he seeks to prove a point, to best her in combat. Yet she is fearful and I have seen him fight before. My Wolf is nigh on unstoppable when he yearns for blood and lacking the truth of his motives, I cannot be sure that such is not his wish. I have no desire to see either of them hurt for they are both friends to me, but nor can I prevent what is to come.
Should I, then, create a potion to aid Marinette in her struggle as she has requested, thereby allowing her a greater chance of survival against a superior opponent? Is that not a betrayal of the very man who made me what I am today? In aiding one friend, am I not harming another? But in refusing to do so, would I not be betraying myself and my beliefs?
These complications make this land so hard to bear. In Angmar everything is simple. We work together or we die alone. I miss that simplicity and I wonder if it is not time that I returned to a world that I can understand, a life in which I have a purpose.
