[The script is the same as before. Again, each log is a new page, and again there is another torn introductory note that reads:]
We have been speaking plenty in person, now that you have recovered from your fever, so much of the stuff I would otherwise write in a report to you feels redundant at best. Still, I have found that there is much to say.
Log 5: Pets, Gifts, & a Child — 5 days ago.
George & Rolf: You now know fully of the condition George is in, after joining me to see him. It brings tears to my eyes, as you saw, but I assure you that I will not shed them in front of him and further lower his morale. The conversation about easing him to a painless death broke my heart, and was difficult to listen to. It was kind of you to give me the option of stepping out so that I wouldn't have to hear, but I know such things are facts of life, and this is not the first time I have dealt with such a situation and patient.
His love for his dog may be one of the most saddening things, for he cares more about that animal than himself. I would see to it that Rolf has a good home if George passes away soon and the dog is not ill as well. Even if I have to take him into my own care I hope one of George’s friends will be able to give active attention and love to Rolf, but with how evasive they are, I worry they won't. Nonetheless, I will continue searching for Clay and a Miss Ashwyneth.
Embarrassment: I apologize for crying when I got the pastries from Madam Denton. I already explained why I did so, but I would like to reiterate I'm usually not so emotio I try to not be so outwardly emotional, though I may fail and cry both freely and often. With the combination of a recent loss of an old friend, Bíld’s nearby leaving for an indeterminate time, and the continued palliative care of George, I'm afraid that it all welled up. Upon receiving such a kind, generous, and considerate gift, the dam burst as my heart was touched so.
Elgerin: We received a new challenge. In regards to Miss Elgerin (have we learned her surname?), I hope dearly she finds her home. While I certainly wouldn’t offer to take her into my own, personal care, I will see to it that she does not end up in a place with other children that are orphaned. I’m not sure on what you theorize, but it makes me saddened to believe that her father either was killed or abandoned her in the wood. On the morrow, I will post in town the notices that you write. Thank you for letting me stay this night to help (I would not want you to attempt to take care of her alone with the way you looked at her as if she were a foreign creature). Now, my candle is burning out, and I should sleep.
Log 6: Elgerin & Hunting — 4 days ago.
I apologize for saying so, but I do find it amusing that you took the child to the Thirsty Boar because she was hungry and you don't know how to cook (I apologize for leaving before breakfast). I know I cannot stay at the Soothery every night and help keep her there, especially if we have other patients staying; it will be good for her to be under the care of a functioning couple in a warm inn rather than two queer physicians (though I know how to care for children, and I say I am alright at it. You, Elias, are in dire, dire need of practice and assistance in that field).
I hope your hunting trip with Master Fiontann goes well, and again I'm ready and proud to care for the Soothery in your absence! Come back soon, and do not get gutted by a boar. Tell me if you manage to ride one.
Log 7: Coney Pie — 3 days ago.
Lady Cedwyn made us coney pies! And she and I held fine conversation as well. I also told her that you will have to settle the payment, as I don't deal with such things. Though I do admit to enjoying one of the pies nearly fully since you have been and are camping. If the other is not eaten for some days, whether you be away or simply not hungry, then I will see to it that it is. For the pure reason it doesn’t spoil, of course. And for the pure reason that I find her meals absolutely delightful (and she made it so beautifully, too). My vice is eating too much.
I'll go finish that first one off now, I think.
Log 8: Jackilyn's Progress — 2 days ago.
I visited Miss Jackilyn. She is looking very well, though still somewhat easily fatigued. I would not recommend her traveling or such. But, while I only went to check she is better, she gave me gifts: a drink, a good conversation, and even something for Bíld. That touched my heart the most, and I hope dearly that Bíld likes it, along with potentially something else she gave me the idea for. Though he is far away I find him frequently in my thoughts; I hope his journey is safe and that we keep frequent contact. I only hope whatever I send him would bring a smile to his face, for his happiness is most vital to me. He makes me fe I realize I am going on a tangent about our friendship, which I'm sure you don't wish to read about. I conclude this log by saying Jackilyn is well. And I was glad to see her up and painting, working on ceramics. It was good to see little Miss Bailey (her kitten) too.
Log 9: Fights and Honesty — Yesterday
I apologize for being unable to help you tend to the contestants of Master Fiontann’s Steel Fisting Tournament. Though I think it was for the best, as watching it would have only brought up bad memories and feelings within myself. It was much better, and I felt better inclined, to help the women take care of Miss Elgerin. A lady's task perhaps, to do so rather than partake and see the fights, but if helping a child rather than supporting violence is feminal, then so be it. I hope she finds a good home soon. It may not be the best to try and return her to her parents at this point in time, due to the mention of lack of food they gave her, lack of love, lack of hugs... It pains me to think that the four or five years of Elgerin's life have not been filled with the utmost amount of care and affection.
Children, to dwarves, are valuable gifts, but she was potentially abandoned, and her parents fought, which is an upsetting thought. She is kind despite this, though shy as most children are. She enjoys drawing, snacks, naps, and hugs (I have not yet hugged her but I often feel compelled to). It is my hope that some good relatives, or that a family wishing for a child to love, will find her. I am grateful that Lady Cedwyn and Master Fiontann will be housing her for a time until news is discovered. If things go on too long with no development, then the search for a new family would begin. I wouldn’t ask for the couple to take her, as Cedwyn already has a son around that age, and they have just recently taken in Miss Catherynne.
* (What did that Man mean when he said he would like to have a “tongue-moving” conversation with me? And why did he use that tone of voice?)
Otherwise, I am gladdened to hear you would like to visit Miss Jackilyn, and I will go along if you wish it. With your talk of traveling West along with Fiontann and Cedwynn (The Boar’s employees will watch Elgerin, then? I assume they have been already while the couple is home?) I was reminded of something I spoke about with her. She also hopes to go West and visit those lands. I personally will not accompany you — someone has to watch the Soothery while you get your seaweed for “turning lead into gold” (still think that is impossible), and I already have plans to go later (though I'm unsure if those are still viable or I would be wanted). I believe that perhaps it would be good to invite Miss Jackilyn along on your trip. She should be fully recovered, or at least well enough that a journey would do good rather than harm, by the time you all go.
* (My mind has been so scatterbrained, I only now realize that you are limping and were with a cane. What happened while hunting? And do I need to look at it? Now I am fretful, Elias.)
[Here, the penmanship hesitates, and the proceeding writing is a little more messy than usual.]
Final thought: I do apologize for the way I fled after our conversation at the Soothery last night. It was not becoming of me. While I'm hardly an example of a proper dwarf, I do try to pride myself on at least being an honest one. The way I left so quickly felt neither honest nor virtuous, and I would like to right such a rude wrong here on the page, for I know I'll only grow red-faced in person.
I could craft an excuse, but instead I admit that talking about it made me feel shameful in its own right. While you were so open and honest about your family and strife to me, I only gave some non-answers before leaving. I admit I’m still not used to others expressing interest and asking questions of me without some malicious intent or some desire to turn it around and use my answers in distasteful jests. But you, Elias, are not such a person that would do such a thing, I know. You are genuinely curious and only wanting to know about me what I know about you.
My father was a miner and fighter, trained and strong. Though he always had a (near unhealthy) fascination for jewels. This must have extended to my mother, who was truly a gem from the Red Mountains. I was the result of a mix between the two; a noble Blacklock mother and Longbeard father from beginnings humble. I was expected to be both at once. I was taught ways with a blade (though, obviously now, I do not apply such knowledge nor do I look fit to), I was taught ways in the mine, I was taught ways with jewels, and I was taught ways with music and food. I was taught eloquence, and I was taught to be irrational at the same time. Half of my day I would be reared in the way of my father, and the other half my mother, and obviously I resulted rather queer. I was not taught the ways of healing by them, nor was I encouraged to follow such a path. I was “gifted with too many other skills” to “deal with matters and craft such as that”. And at ninety-something years of age I left my home in the Hills and haven't visited once since.
I know not when I plan to visit them again. Though Madam Denton reminded me that I wish to get some recipes from my mother — including the recipe for the treats the woman had sent. Another reason why it made me cry so, because though they didn’t taste like my mother’s, they were very considerate all the same. Mother said she will not give me a single one until I have a family and continue our lineage as her only son, though which as you know We already spoke of those matters and that is only another reason why I feel shameful. You told me you could not give your mother what she desired from a son, which resonated profoundly; I continue to see similarities between us in such ways, despite how vastly different we are.
'Supposed' son of Haddoct I have been called, and 'supposed', I suppose, is a good word to sum it all.
I hope you can forgive me for my behavior, and hopefully this explains some things about myself which you may have been curious on. I look forward to seeing you at work soon.
[Again at the end of the page is the gaudy signature of 'Maddoct son of Haddoct', and beneath that the date of submission: The twenty-ninth of July.]
